My dreams lately are exhausting. I wake up frustrated or annoyed and don't really need another factor that keeps me from sleeping well. They're also recurring, the same theme almost every night. Alan's become accustomed to me describing my dreams each morning. This has been going on for two to three weeks.
So the basic theme is that I can't get where I'm supposed to be going. I've had a few where I'm starting a new job and am having trouble getting around the building. I'm trying to take the elevator to my floor, but I can't find the right elevator or corridor, or someone sends me in the wrong direction. Last night some aliens, like those from Halo, were invading the building and blocking the elevators!
Or I'm traveling and trying to catch a flight or a connecting flight. Can't get to the gate or figure out where I'm supposed to sit. Twice now I've dreamed that someone points me in a direction that ends up being a major construction area outside of the airport, with rubble and barriers, and it's completely deserted.
Or I'm teaching a class and can't find the class, or with a slightly different angle, can't find the supplies, lesson plans, etc. to teach the class. Or the classroom is dark, and I can't get the lights to work, geez. It's a little different but kind of similar to the test dreams I used to have, where I have an important exam but am running late or forgot to study or can't find the room and ultimately blow the test.
I've often heard that what seems like the literal translation of a dream is not always the case. But this does appear fairly straightfoward. I'm not sure where I'm going. And even if I sort of think I know where I'm supposed to be, I'm not prepared when I get there.
I definitely don't have a true sense of purpose right now. I'm not working, and sometimes I feel a little self-conscious about that. Alan and I are content with how things are, but I wrestle with it daily.
And then again all these dreams could have to do with one specific thing. It was three weeks ago that I found out Bailey is expecting. I can say with certainty that I wasn't and still am not fully prepared for that and have no idea what the future holds. And strangely, in at least two of these dreams, I've been holding someone's baby. So weird! Maybe after a while when Bailey has some plans in place, and I'm not worrying as much (although I think we're doing a good job handling this!), these dreams will subside...
Okay this song has nothing to do with dreams, but often when I can't sleep I think of an old James Taylor song "Sleep Come Free Me." I don't know how to embed it correctly into Blogger, so go YouTube it. Kind of dreary, but good.